Grinchy Who.

Am I a Grinch or a Who?
I'm neither, but if I had to choose, I'd say I'm more on the Grinch-y side of things.

I can't say I'm a Who, because I HATE snow, Christmas carols, cold and being forced to fake a reaction to a terrible present. Now, you might think that saying faking a reaction is just ungrateful, but you don't know what my family's like. Want to know what my aunt got me for Christmas last year?  

What the hell is that, that Lascelles can't even seem to face, you might ask? A battery operated, Tinkerbell themed tulip lamp. Cute. I'm seventeen. Also, I like to mess with my dad, and tell him I want things that I usually don't. As soon as he hears that I want something, he'll file it away in his head as a present. It doesn't matter if I add "Haha, I'm joking. I hate those." In his head, he only registers the phrase "I want that." Which could be a good thing. But not always. For instance, my dad does a lot of travelling for his job, and he is on the reserves a lot. So on one of his trips, I asked him to get me a pair of moccasins. So when he called me one night to ask what size my feet were, I was stoked. He then asked what kind of moccasins I wanted, and since I don't know anything about Native footwear, I just said I don't know. This was the rest of our conversation.

"So.... Do you want the boot ones, that have lots of fur?" my Dad asked.

"Oh yes, for sure, I love shoving my feet into rabbits. I would love a pair of those boots. Actually, you might as well just catch me some rabbits. It'll be the same thing." I replied.

"Okay, well there's like flat ones..?" He came back with.

"Alright, that works." And those were my final words.

Unfortunately, this was my dad. And he tuned out after "Oh yes, for sure." And that is why I own massive boots that can double as a pet rabbit that make me hate myself every time I wear them. Just so you're aware, I never wear fur. I don't find it attractive at all, and ever since I was a little kid I was against it. But that one sarcastic statement erased all those memories of me crying every time I saw my Grandma wearing a fur coat, and every time I got sent to my room for yelling at her and saying she was a heartless animal murderer. But whatever. He spent a lot of money on them, so I felt obligated to wear them. And they turned out to be the comfiest things I've ever worn. So don't judge me for wearing them, because I know they're really terrible, but how comfy they are rules out all of that.

But I can't say I'm a Grinch, because I LOVE Christmas baking, spending time with my family and all of the Yule tide festivities. I absolutely love holidays with my family, because we all just have personalities that clash, so there's always arguments and fights. Now, after hearing that, you might think "What the hell, that doesn't sound great at all." Well, generally, that part isn't, but after about an hour, to be able to deal with each other, everyone over fifteen just gets drunk, and it  leads to awesome fun hilarious times. Last Christmas, my uncle got wasted and sat down beside me to give me a twenty minute lecture about how I was going nowhere with my life and had to change before it was too late. Or at least that's what I think he was talking about, I'm not really to sure, he slurred a lot. I didn't know how to handle it, because it was half terrible, half hilarious so I pretty much just died laughing. And then he invited the neighbours over by standing on the porch and yelling at them, and I left while he was distracted. Apparently, they had a hot tub party, and my uncle slept on the back deck because he couldn't remember how to unlock the door.

Reading over that, it makes my uncle sound like a terrible drunk.. He really isn't, he's just hilarious. And not all of us always get drunk. Just a vast majority.

So, I am a Grinchy Who.

That is all.

RANDOM: I lied. I feel the urge to share something. Does everyone remember little Cindy Lou Who, from the Grinch Who Stole Christmas? Well, she's now in one of my favourite bands, The Pretty Reckless. She's not so little and cute anymore. And knowing that she used to be Cindy Lou Who makes me laugh.